Relaxation: Leaning into Christ’s Rest
I can still vividly remember how sweet the days of summertime in Chicago felt as a little girl. I can taste the watermelon splashed with lake water, I can smell the charcoal barbeque pit, I can hear the sound of rain on the swimming pool; mostly, though, I can remember the way time passed so slowly I was certain summer would go on forever.
Looking back on those years now, I know the reason time seemed to stand still was because I had a wide-open schedule. Without school, dance classes, sports, or set activities on the calendar turbo-boosting the day, time wandered rather than raced. There were chores to be done, sure, but there was no hurry. No rush. We worked hard knowing we would have the rest of our eternal summer day for play. For exploring. For rest.
Now, as a thirty-two-year-old mother of three, I’m learning that the summers of my childhood simply don’t happen by accident anymore. I know now that just because a month starts with the letter “J” doesn’t mean responsibilities will disappear. Whether you are a doctor with patients to see, an author with a book to write, a full-time mother with meals to make and babies to hold, or a combination of all three—there is always work to be done. Maybe you work full time, and rather than summer being a long pause in the year, it becomes a circus act pushing you to juggle your job, meals, childcare, and summer camps. Maybe your children being home all day shines light on unique struggles and you feel overwhelmed. Or maybe your summers are filled with travel and traditions with little room for a true exhale.
Life often feels like a marathon to endure. We stay up late with planners and post-it notes to squeeze everything in. We try to spin all the plates and just make it out alive. We see anything that gets in the way of a well-deserved break as a threat. What does it look like, though, to relax in a way that leaves us refreshed, provides a healthy balance with work, and, most importantly, honors the Lord?
God’s Design for Rest and Relaxation
In Genesis, we see that God created rhythms for us to follow. On day four of creation, he said, “Let there be light-bearers (sun, moon, stars) in the expanse of the heavens to separate the day from the night, and let them be useful for signs (tokens) [of God’s provident care], and for marking seasons, days, and years,”[1] and on day seven, he follows his good and glorious work of creation by establishing a pattern of rest for his people.[2]
This reminds us that work and rest existed in harmony before the fall—they are part of God’s original design. But now we can distort these gifts, pursuing them from sinful motivation or desiring them in excess. We tend to view our work as our worth and tighten our grip on more and more tasks for status, monetary gain, and true fulfillment. In contrast, some of us see excessive relaxation, self-indulgence, and even sloth as something we deserve as a result for stewarding what has been entrusted to us.
Christ lived a life of service and sacrifice and yet still valued rest.[3] When we preach the gospel to ourselves in our own battle to pursue relaxation, we can find peace in knowing we have a Savior who went before us. He calls us to trade our business and burdens for true rest in his finished work on the cross.
Learning Our Limits
As we enjoy the months ahead—whether we find ourselves bogged down with work or staring at a sea of open, empty days—we can look to the Word to guide our approach to refreshment. The Lord commands us to rest, to still our anxious minds and hearts, and to surrender our striving.[4] So it’s not only suggested that we slow down—it’s required. We are hard-wired with the need for relaxation.
Relaxation is also a kindness of the Lord, a gift that both renews us and allows us to go on glorifying him through our work while also reminding us of our limitations. Christ says, “Take my yoke upon you . . . and you will find rest for your souls” (Matt. 11:29). When we relax from our regular labor and toil, we remember that Christ’s burden is “light” and he provides true freedom and grace from endless striving.
Relaxation That Honors the Lord
Still, relaxation doesn’t always come naturally (all the mothers collectively nodding). But as we tend to our family’s schedule, we can put proper boundaries in place to honor God and point our children’s eyes to Christ in our homes. When we say no to events and activities as necessary, we can teach our children that, while God is infinite, we are finite. When we enforce and follow healthy habits of getting enough sleep, slowing down, and calming our minds, we can teach our children that, while God is omnipotent, we are weak and in need of his replenishment. Amidst regular temptations to say yes and no to the wrong things—yes to overscheduling and no to true rest, quiet, and sleep—healthy boundaries make way for rest that restores.
True relaxation doesn’t look like ceasing work while allowing our thoughts and spirits to stay in a state of constant hurry, stress, and activity. In Marva Dawn’s book, Keeping the Sabbath Wholly, she asks a series of questions that I find myself returning to whenever refreshment feels simultaneously necessary and difficult: “What draws us deeper into worship?” “How can we build ceasing into our lives?” “Where is quiet reflection in our lives?” And “How do we rest our minds?”
As we ask such questions of ourselves and build margin in our lives for true, soul-satisfying relaxation, we reorient our hearts back to the source of ultimate refreshment. We remember that it isn’t in abstaining from responsibility or in a week-long, child-free vacation that we will find true rest but in the finished work of Christ. And this is the joy we can point our children to as well.
[1] Genesis 1:14 (AMP)
[2] Genesis 2:2-3; Ex. 20:8-11
[3] Mark 4:35-40
[4] Exodus 20:8; Psalm 46:10; Hebrews 4:9
Reflection Questions:
Do you tend to lean towards an unhealthy desire to work in excess or unhealthy desire to rest in excess? How can you shift the deepest desires of your heart to honor God with balance in this area?
What boundaries will you set in place this summer to prioritize rest and relaxation as a family
Can you remember a moment this summer where you felt truly, deeply relaxed? What were you doing—or more important, what were you not doing?
Application Ideas:
Consider implementing a weekly family Sabbath if you haven’t yet.
Routinely spend time in nature. Encourage the kids to go on a nature walk and notice everything blooming, changing, and thriving during this season.
Walk and talk with the Lord, enjoying his creation.
Pay attention to the moments you feel most relaxed and try to create that same environment as often as you can.
Don’t save your relaxation for when the kids are in bed. Rest and relax right alongside them, whether you’re baking, reading, swimming, napping, or whatever you find to be most restorative—let your children see that rest is a good thing.
Look for opportunities to create restfulness for your future self. Meal prep easy foods on a day where you have extra time, buy the paper plates, or maybe book a babysitter swap with friends!
